Thursday, January 20, 2011

You know those nights...

The ones where you are wide awake for hours on end and know that the more you stay up the less you are sleeping and thinking about that continues the vicious cycle for more time than you'd like? Welcome to one of those nights for me...

It's taken a long while to get here, where I can actually say I am wide awake in the middle of the night-by my own "doing" if you will. For between the girls, over the past near four years if you include being pregnant, I have given up the rights to dictate when I was awake and when I was asleep. Until now, sort of...

Our girls sleep SO well these days. I think about it often, how I'd like to kiss those sleep Gods, whomever they are, and thank them for helping us to raise a near 3 year old who doesn't get out of her bed without us in the room EVER and a 15 month old who asks to take her naps, sleeps wonderfully at night and for finally reaching the point where both girls don't wake up before 6 am-most days.

But here I sit, well lie actually, thinking about and worrying about our girls... Knowing that if I just could close my eyes and "clear my mind" as the woman at the spa and yoga say, I'd just fall back to sleep--case and point the handsome gentleman to my left... :) But I can't, I've tried... Instead I have searched Facebook, read my email, updated myself on the world's comings and goings, counted to 100-forwards and backwards, read a trashy magazine and even tried the good ol' "flower breathing" from my teaching days... Nada!

I now contemplate, when is it too early to start my day? Having been up since 2:15 or so-a good near 2 hours of sleep a wash-I feel the treadmill calling my name, the news is on at 4:30, that has to be a "reasonable hour?!" And then I look over to my right and listen... The faint snoring of my peaceful duo reminds me that they will be expecting 110% today and therefore, I MUST find a way to conk out, if only for a quick cat nap-our cat slept nearly all day btw-what is with that phrase?

So, off I go... To attempt to close my eyes and head to dreamland--thinking of Mexican beaches, snow falling gently outside, my incredible family and hoping for some near perfect simultaneous naps today!

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